​Why You Are Not Married Yet???

Oftentimes, acquaintances, friends,  co-workers, relatives, & church mates asked me of why I am not yet married. I always heared them said that I passed the age of child bearing and I will have a hard time giving birth. Other’s doubted of the sincerity of my boyfriend towards me. “Maybe your boyfriend is not so into you” they said. Some spiritual bullies will say that by the time I will have kids, groceries must be too high and tuition fees must be too hard to afford. There are also those who said that we must be so down and too poor to afford for a wedding. Well, so many opinions here, there, and everywhere.  Thankfully, over the years, I learn that respecting one’s opinion is a virtue (hahaha).
Here are probably the reasons why:
1) I became a teenager in my thirties. I went through a lot in life that I needed so much emotional healing only the Lord can perform. All I needed is a love from a Father In Heaven but working in the church allowed me to experience an earthly father’s love from my Pastors, and from the fathers in the church. I realized that there a great fathers who existed as well as great men who loves the Lord. 

2) My boyfriend is way younger than I am that when I was graduating in high school, he was still in grade 1. The Holy Spirit must have worked in my heart to guard me and helped me from saying no to the wrong person so I could say yes to the special man whom He had prepared for me. There were times that I cried my heart to sleep while confessing what He has put in my heart that “God Has Prepared Someone Special For Me” and I always answer that when people teased me of having no boyfriend when I landed in my 30’s. 
3) I still want to enjoy a teenage life of being in a relationship because I never experienced what it meant to be a teenager due to the fact that my mother died when I was 10 and I’m guessing that I became a very mean instant mom then. To be a mother way too early for a job you don’t know while also have no knowledge of God was too difficult. How I prayed that my brother and sisters will grow up and will have the best in life and I dreamed of breathing from being an instant mom. Thankfully, they all did and are growing in the Lord and I am also enjoying my single life. Thank you Jesus💗

4) I am still learning how to be a woman in Christ. I long wanted to become a wife. In fact when my uncle asked me what I really wanted, I answered, to become a Godly wife who brings her children to church and who will support her husband. My goodness, I don’t even know why I desired that in my teens. Oh how I prayed that my husband will not be a seaman or someone working overseas because of my sincere desire to become a Godly wife. 

5) We are still working in our finances. No, I don’t want a big wedding but I also don’t want to be stressed out with our finances. A little savings in the bank and hopefully future businesses and investments is a big help. Thank you Jesus. I’ve seen how money stressed my mother way back. How she cried in the night. How she became deaf because her food was given to all of us. And how she became mentally ill because of too much worries and anxiety. This is why I wanted all of us to become a good steward with our finances. 

6) I need to know first how to be a Godly wife.  I need mentorship. I need to see good examples of marriages founded by His truth.  Thank God for bringing to me Christian Ladies whom I can see as growing in the Lord while having a deep respect and love to their husbands. 

So while we had our Bible Study, Ter Yan surprisingly gave me and Ter Anne this book. I’ve seen this book way back then but I was not interested. I read and I was attacked with panic and depression (hahaha). The author is so sweet. My Bible Ladies are so gentle and kind.  I can’t be this woman. I realized that my heart needs cleansing of His Word so that it will submit to what He said, not to what I feel. 

I pray that marriages are strengthened by your relationship in Christ and may the single ladies out there will have to learn to wait for the person whom God has for them. For the time being, enjoy Jesus and His direction for your life. 
Have A Lovely Day💗💗💗

My Love Affair With Dogs

Looking back, I have no affection and likings  with dogs. For one, I don’t like the idea that I have to clean after their mess. Number 2, I am afraid that they will bite me, put their rabbies on me and I will be hospitalized and they don’t care (Hahaha). 

But, since I transferred in my brother’s house, I saw his heart for animals. He has plenty of dogs, birds, roosters, and many more. I saw how he bathed the dogs and I observed how the dogs has been kind to him. 

The first dog that has my heart was Kyle. He was a white hairy dog and knows his bosses that he scared the strangers to death. We feel protected in his barking. When I got home late at night, Kyle will meet me in the most dark places going to my brothers house and led me home. When there are strangers who seemed to have an odd look at me, he barked them and sometimes even pursued them. Then one day Kyle was sick. He became very very weak. He doesn’t want to eat anymore. I could not hear his barking to protect me. On one occasion,  he just looked me in the eye as if he was saying that I must take care of me amd he was so sad that he might leave me. Then the crashed of my heart came when I woke up one day and I could not find Kyle. I asked only to find out that Kyle has been buried because sickness took him away and I wasn’t able to hug him and say my thanks and goodbye. I was mourning. I was very very sad. And by that time, I don’t have a camera so I don’t have a picture of Kyle.
[Jeru when he was so sick.]Our other dog Jeru who had been with us was mourning too. He did not bark for a week and I can see how lonely he was in his eyes. Then Jeru was so sick. In his sickness, I find myself laying my hands praying for our eldest dog. My father brought him bread everyday. We grieved with him because he lost his playmate as much as we lost our beautiful bodyguard. Our house all of sudden became so lonely. It was then I realized that I love dogs because I could see how helpless they were when they don’t have good people to take care of them. It was a time of acceptance that we got our brothers heart for dogs. My brother is indeed of man of compassion and mercy to animals and people. Yes, we have our very own Pope in our home. 

Last week when we got home, a very beautiful black dog welcomed me and my boyfriend. He is so handsome. His hair flows gently. And, he is the sweetest. I had him in my lap and he never cries nor bark. He just stayed there as if he felt the safest in his life. Oh, how I wanted to take him with me but everyone loves our new found friend. 

So, here’s Wayne the Cutie. 

*****************************************************What are the lessons I learned by having dogs? Well, they are teaching me to be selfless because I have to look after them. I have to think about them and love them even when they fail me. And that kind of being selfless is translated when I am with people. I learn to love unselfishly specially when I am tempted not to love. I learn loyalty just like how my brother’s dog has been loyal to me. I learned compassion specially to those who can’t speak for themselves because while dogs protect, they needed someone to stand up for them who will embrace them as their own. I learn unconditional love just like dogs who keep on loving even if I give them the crumbs of my food, regardless, they still embrace it as the best kind of love. 

Thank you Lord for my Brother’s Dogs that stirs my heart to love💟

Valentines On A Budget 

So today is Monday and I was thinking in the night before that I will have to wake up early to do laundry. I did but I am not hammering clothes, rather I am up with my greatest coffee in my beautiful mug, smell the beauty of dawn and tinker my tab. You see, I am always up at dawn for work and by virtue of being a thinker, Tuesday is coming and I have to keep saying thank you for calling, not to mention the quality of calls to consider plus the AHT, and my supervisor even said that I have to work on my pronunciation, so help me God. 

And yes, I will be working on a Day of Hearts but I know that I will be seeing flowers here and there in the arms of beautiful ladies and probably in the flood of chocolates in purses or in boxes everywhere. I would like to say that romance is good but to have a happy hormones in a just day is not a good ground for a lasting relationship. For one, it may break someone elses budget, probably becoming a romantic one day millionaire but scratching a bald head even before the 15th day.

I told my boyfriend that we don’t need to be extravagant this Valentines because I have experience a deep kind of love with him on a daily basis. I am well respected, honored,  cherished, loved, protected, and prayed for everyday. I am wonderfully blessed. And he is blessed with me too by my antic jokes and boisterous laughter when I am in the best mood. And he gets so use to my beast mode too. Oh well, my silliness makes him thinks that I am the best woman in the world. Opps, Fenelyn, if you are reading, you remains to be his number one but since you are in Canada so you are still his number one. Hahahaha.

So here’s to a simple but meaningful Valentines:

1) Cook for your girlfriend/boyfriend her/his fave meal. In our case, I always volunteer to wash the dishes but cooking isn’t my cup of tea so being his partner in the ketchin is a teamwork to be treasured. I can always admire him for his passion for cooking and how lovely the meal turns out to be with him by my side. 

2) Write Love Letters to Your Significant Others. Being a writer, I always do that for him but promise, the letters that he gave me way back was so beautiful to cherish with his unique handwriting in it. I love how the ink melted on the cards and how those wonderful words melted my hearts up until this day. It just reminds me of how great this man is and how he becomes greater and greater as days and months and years went by.

3) Listen. Yes. It does not need a cent to show your spouse or boyfriend or girlfriend their value. Give them your undivided attention. Listen with the excitement of your eyes and with the attentiveness of your ears. You have no idea how romantic it could be most specifically to ladies. 

5) Say I Love You Personally. Don’t text it. Don’t call and say it over the phone. Make it so personal. Tell her or him how a blessing she or he in your life. And to those who have the love language of affirmation? ? That’s a ticket to a happy year and a joyful love life. 

6) Pray For Your Significant Others. Every day my boyfriend take me to work and when I get out from his motor bike, he will lay his hands on me and prayed that I will have the best day at work. You have no idea over how it made me so secure to report to work and face whatever is at stake because I know that I am being prayed. I always report with my close up smile regardless of my yellowish teeth because I am so sure that God hears his prayers over me. 

So to people out there who is so overwhelmed on what to give to your someone special, worry no more. It’s not your one day of sweetness that makes a difference but it’s how you make your significant other feel so loved and valued with or without occassions. 

But if you feel that you can’t relate because you are not in a relationship, then think of someone whom you would like to feel honored and loved this Valentines. You may wanna treat the street kids to Jollibee and see their happy smile and genuine thank you. I used to do that way back and it always reminds me of how blessed I am to have been given the opportunity to love those who can’t believe that love still exists.

My gosh?!? How come I just know about this?? Hahahaha

When Will You Have A Boyfriend?!?

This is February and LOVE IS IN THE AIR as people say. We hear it from the radio. Watch it on TV. In fact, worst these days is being able to watch these teenagers doing some kissing scene with their boyfriend and girlfriend and everyone is saying it’s okay in the name of drama. Thankfully, in my time, I grew up with no TV and all the radio drama can just be formulated in my imaginations. And in my imaginations are marriages that last for a lifetime. The couple who love each other and bring their children to the church. Etc. Etc.

Then I came to the City to search for a scholarship so I can study and my mind was opened to the reality.  People related your identity to being IN A RELATIONSHIP. If you are NOT, then you are UGLY. But, I knew then that I was because that’s what my neighbors told me. I WAS AND AM UGLY:mrgreen: But, I don’t believe this label anymore. I AM WONDERFULLY AND BEAUTIFULLY MADE BY GOD. No more. No less.

I tried to prove myself showing that I am a woman with worth even without a boyfriend. I studied so hard. Then I happened to join a CHRISTIAN ORGANIZATION. There, I participated in their activities and I was in the THEATER MINISTRY where I made people laugh. People thought that I am funny and being so celebrated I tried to be a people person and continued to make people laugh even if it saps my energy. That started the DAY WHEN I BECOME SOMEONE ELSE JUST SO I FIND MY WORTH.

And I turned into my late 20’s. People who worshipped Jesus wondered why I did not have a boyfriend. They said no one probably will like me because I am too short and ugly. In fact, I remember a visiting church from Manila with so many delegates and there was this guy who seemed to have interest on me and finally a very spiritual matured woman told him don’t because I am too short and how pitiful our children might be. OUCH!!!! These are ladies who worshipped God in public but are way too mean. I became way too bitter and I can’t rejoice to those who have a boyfriend much more to those who are married.

I silently cried. But I remember what the Holy Spirit told me in my heart, “I HAVE PREPARED SOMEONE SPECIAL FOR YOU.” That was the best relief. HIS PROMISE. Then I learned that my tongue has the power over life and death. So when people asked me, when will you have a boyfriend, I just answered that GOD HAS PREPARED SOMEONE SPECIAL FOR ME. I said that over and over and over again until they will get tired of asking me WHEN.

So to everyone out there who are being pressured by peers in order to have a boyfriend, HERE ARE MY UNSOLICITED TIPS:

1) BE CONVINCED THAT YOUR WORTH IS IN CHRIST. Jesus was the ONLY ONE who shed His blood for you because He loves you even before you said YES to Him. He went through Hell for you so Heaven will be yours. He is the best boyfriend ever. I promise you. I enjoyed my single life when I discover that life isn’t about RELIGION but your RELATIONSHIP WITH JESUS CHRIST. The rest are just bonus but HE IS THE ULTIMATE BEST.

2) CELEBRATE YOU. People may label you as ugly, short, bitter, unlovable, etc.and that’s fine. Why? Because they only make a judgment about you out of what they perceived you to be but GOD ACCEPTED YOU AS YOU and that’s what matters most. Don’t become like someone else in order to be celebrated. Remember this quote? IT IS BETTER TO BE HATED FOR WHO YOU ARE THAN TO BE LOVED FOR WHO YOU ARE NOT.” I was there. I was having a horror kind of life by playing a dual personality just to appreciated. Become the best version of yourself because it is when you are authentic that the best YOU SHINES OUT.

3) APPRECIATE AND ENHANCE YOUR PHYSICAL SELF. It’s true that I am short and people may think that I am ugly but NO ONE CAN CONQUER SOMEONE WHO BELIEVES IN THEMSELVES. In the process of being belittled, I learned to present myself well in public and as I valued myself, I find that people valued me as well. 

4) HAVE FUN. Don’t take life too seriously simply because you don’t have a boyfriend. Learn to laugh. Be gentle with yourself. Enjoy being around peple and celebrate others as well. It is when you are relatable that people start noticing how wonderful you are as a person. 

5) GET BUSY WHILE WAITING FOR GOD’S SPECIAL BEST IN YOUR LIFE. Your life should not stop simply because you are not in a relationship with someone else. Find a good cause to join or get involve in your Local Church. Visit the sick people in the hospital and pray for them. Be generous. Be a friend. Finish your masters perhaps and excel in your craft. Dream and start doing it. Remember that beautiful people are those who keeps on dreaming and doing their dreams. They are the ONE’S who shine the most. 

6) DON’T MIND WHAT PEOPLE SAID. Take note that the bashers remain to be bashers behind their mouth and probably their computer’s screen but if you focus on what God want’s you to do, it’s you who will succeed in life. How will I know? I was there. I’ve seen those who bashed me in the past and still bashed me now but aren’t progressing but I also know that KINDNESS IS ALWAYS THE BEST REVENGE. 

Those are just few of them. 

So, if you are not in a relationship as of yet and people are bashing you, SMILE AND KEEP BELIEVING FOR YOUR BEST. GOD has His best for you in mind. And when you are in a relationship with JESUS CHRIST, then you must be in the BEST STATE KIND OF LIFE.

Don’t be pressured by the people around you. Take it as a challenge to MAKE YOUR DREAM COME TO LIFE AND ONE DAY WHEN YOU HAVE YOUR BEST, inspire other girls or boys to learn to wait for the best.

Taken when we had our vacation with my boyfriend’s family in Leyte💗

5TH ANNIV & COUNTING

January 20th marked the fifth year anniversary for me and my boyfriend and we have been so thankful of the journey that God has allowed us to walk on together. 

The relationship started way back when during our church activity,  I saw that he had a classy camera and he took so many pictures for all of us that I figured that he should add me in at Facebook and tagged me for all my pictures. We were so thin then and he was not my type being so white and was terribly shy who only smiled but seldom talked.

This was how white and thin he was when we started as friends and this was the place where we had our church activity. This was at Genesis Valley in Pit-os Talamban Cebu City I guess (Hopefully this is correct information) because it was too long ago already.

And I was always thin, having a tired and happy eyes, and oh how I miss my long and straight hair too. I wanna have my hair rebonded but I am already working now and I don’t want all the attention that I will be getting for having a new hair so I will not do anything with my hair now (hahahaha).

And these were my Bible Study and church friends.

There were a lot of us but it will take so much time checking the photos. Majority in these photo were new babes in Christ. So precious children of God.

True enough, after the activity were over, he added me on Facebook and tagged me for all my photos. He initially chatted me on messenger and I respectfully responded because I cannot be mean to new people at church. Newbies were my assignment then and I could not lose anyone of them so I have no choice but to force myself to be kind even if I don’t want to (confession time for being a real kind of fake minister, sorry). 

Being single then and having an assigned car to drive, I stayed in the church even until midnight because the internet connection were so high and I can you tube and chat all I want. True enough, at midnight hour, when I was about to go home, the gate was locked and I can’t get out. The gate was so hard to open and having my skinny figure, very underweight to be exact, I don’t have enough power to open it and drove back home. I was so happy because I had an excuse to stay in the church and Facebook with all I want. I was a Facebook and Joel Osteen addict then. However, when I went back to the office, he send me a message so I thought that it would be best to answer him having all the high internet connection that I wanted. I told him that I was stucked in the church premises alone and he offered to opened the gate for me. I did not believe in him so I just jokingly answered why not?? I thought that he was just joking like everyone else who had been so used to have me stayed in the church. Fifteen minutes later, I heard the church buzz sounded and when I went down, viola, it was him. I suddenly believe that he was a man of his word and he must be a good match to my single friends then (hahahaha). 

After that short kind of personal encounter apart from our weekly Bible Study, he texted me every 4 o’clock in the morning and asked if I could be his bestfriend. And since he helped me, I would be very ungrateful if I refused. He would always told me how he would be so sad if one day I will have a boyfriend and we can’t eat out and laughed together. I feel the same way too but I thought that he was not interested on me so I did not assumed anything. That’s always the sermon of our Pastor to single ladies, “Don’t assume that a guy likes you simply because they are nice to you or give you flowers and chocolates. Accept what they give but don’t fantasize because they might borrow money from you as their motive or ask you as bridge to know someone else.” Ouch!!!!

Our friendship grew and we were officially in a relarionship on the 20th of January. We let our relationship flourished and we kept quiet but being a leader in the church, we could not hide it any longer. We told our Pastor and to my embarrasment, he announced it to the whole congregation during every service. There I realized that I hated to be the center of attention. How I wanted to be invisible but he was a man enough to face the heat of the moment and so gracious to stand when asked to. Everyone knew him. Everyone liked him. Everyone asked how in the world will I ever have the kindest boyfriend being fully known as strong woman, old being in my 30’s, short, and not so physically beautiful.  Yes. Someone asked me that! Promise. It stirred up the rest of the single ladies to believe of their own forever.

On our First year, he was my personal body guard and personal assistant while I was his personal driver too (hahahaha).

Fast forward until our fifth year, I learned how wonderful of a gentleman he is and how he grew to become a wonderful leader to me and for others. He is a firm man but so peaceful and content that his personality rubbed off on me. He is a happy kind of guy who makes me laugh. He is a peaceful man who meets a perfect melancholy woman and that makes a perfect temperament match. 

This year I told him that he does not need to buy me gift knowing that we will be saving a big amount of money monthly. 

I surprised him with this gift. I did not spend anything for this but he find it to be so cute and sweet coming from a not so sweet girlfriend that I am. 

To make it more beautiful, he bought a small cake to match it. On this picture,  I already eaten half of it (Hahahaha).

And in all those five years, we held on each other when we were in the valley and gain some weight in the process too.

Glory to God for our Happy 5th and counting. 

And as I am writing this, I figured that Jesus is a perfect match maker if we  only TRUST IN HIM. 

💑

Lasting Love & Living Promises

Hello everyone. How are you?? May this day be a joyful day to you no matter how this day looks. To the single people who are not in a relationship, may you take a pause for a moment and see how blessed you are to be alive and healthy. To those who are in a relationship, may you enjoy today, and more than anything romantic, may you all reflect the real kindness of the One who is love and proved His love to the point of death. To those who are struggling today, maybe in health, relationship issues, and finances, may you find the resolve to still walk with strings in your steps knowing that when the sun sets, the sun shines again.

Let me share to you a preview of what I will be sharing later to the youth. That to find a lasting love and living promises, it’s never in a man or a woman, it’s in Jesus Christ alone.

 

Ruth 1:16-17 But Ruth said, “Don’t force me to leave you; don’t make me go home. Where you go, I go; and where you live, I’ll live. Your people are my people, your God is my god; where you die, I’ll die, and that’s where I’ll be buried, so help me GOD–not even death itself is going to come between us!” The Msg

1. J – Just decide not to go back to your past.

2. E – Envelope yourself in firy believers.

3. S – Start fresh.

4. U – Understand who you are in Him.

5. S – Stand On Your Ground.

Jesus is our lasting love and He is our living promise. It’s only in Him that we can trust and hope. It’s in Him that we can start afresh. In Him that we can be sustained daily through His grace. In Him that we can expect for a better tomorrow.

Happy Valentines day everyone & before you thank the love of your life that may you pause and thank the Lord Jesus in your heart.

Jesus Loves You🌻

One True Love

Love. Love. Love. One Word. But. The Most Profound. Everyone’s looking and searching for it. Everyone wants to feel it. They say it’s the most beautiful thing if found. We are looking for one true Love at home. At work. At the train station. At the jeepney stop. At Starbucks. At Bos. In the chat room. Anywhere. Who is Love? What is Love? Where is the Love? We think it’s in being in a relationship. Others think it’s in getting married. While some still believe it’s at home. Some said, it’s loving oneself.

I thought that way much more than people could ever think of. I joined religion in search for love. I thought Love is in being religious. I do everything religion tells me because I thought the better I am, the more Love I could have received. I do everything in search for Love but the emptiest I became.

Then the sudden stopped. I thought the world is ending.  I thought not doing something good in the opinions of human race is equivalent to God hating me. But I was extremely tired and exhausted. My goodness isn’t enough. I lifted my hand with my tears streaming down my face and my mouth calls one name that completely changed my life – JESUS💙

Then I saw His sacrifices. His prayers. His heart. His life. His death. He died for me. He went through hell for me. I was on His mind. That even if I’m the only woman alive on earth, He will still do anything for me because He is Love. He can’t bear seeing me helpless.

His love for me wasn’t just mere words. His love was displayed on the Cross. It was proven.  Between the demons and me, He chose me. The worst sinner in the world.

I can’t tell you of the best kind of love other than the love displayed by My Forever, JESUS. He extended it by giving me Jonelo yet then again, everytime I am with my boyfriend, I can’t help but thank JESUS. For sure, it started with JESUS, it will end with JESUS, and it’s JESUS in between.

Say YES to the HOLY SPIRIT’S courtship and surrender to JESUS. Just SAY, YES, JESUS. I surrender. I want to give You a try. He will not get mad when you feel that way. But, I’m sure, as you begin your relationship with Him, it’s going to be the BEST relationship ever in life. You don’t do anything to earn His Love. Just say YES to JESUS and let Him lead.

I always say that relationship is a risk but the one sure risk is a life surrendered to the ONE who loves BEST – JESUS💙

I don’t know how to still tell you my friends, but I promise you, JESUS really loves you. He really does. It’s religion that burdens you, not Him.

Call the best Hotline. One Word. One Name. – JESUS💙

Philippians 2:8-11 Having become human, he stayed human. It was an incredibly humbling process. He didn’t claim special privileges. Instead, he lived a selfless, obedient life and then died a selfless, obedient death–and the worst kind of death at that: a crucifixion. Because of that obedience, God lifted him high and honored him far beyond anyone or anything, ever, so that all created beings in heaven and on earth–even those long ago dead and buried–will bow in worship before this Jesus Christ, and call out in praise that he is the Master of all, to the glorious honor of God the

Father.The Msg

Jesus Loves You🌻