Tear Flows

In life, there comes a time that you have no other encouragement to give, rather what’s left are hidden waters that rushed out as raging tears. That’s exactly what happens today. 

I am AHT challenged at work and if you are a call center agent, you understand. I am being challenged to perform and I don’t have enough juices to excrete, if there is, it’s nothing but a bitter liquid that might provide a worst taste to anyone who likes to lick. Then I was about to retreat into a solitary place like Jesus always does when I was followed by a pain in the neck reminder of my terrible performance for this month and week. I was aggravated,  worst, discouraged, and muttered, it’s enough, I’ve got enough, I wanna quit. And my bitter taste spread like wildflower to the blooming lilies and to my surprise, I’ve got their sweet encouragement/s I never thought I’ve received. 

And so to my dry parched emotion rain down river of tears that won’t stop falling just like a visiting rain longed and prayed by the prophet in the Bible. I absorbed like a sponge but still undecided on which road to take but through it all, I feel so blessed to have been showered by roses when I there’s nothing but thorn in both my path and ways. 

So in between sobs and ugly tears is the knowing that my Heavenly Father cares😢😂😄😃


Love at 3

Long before I was in a serious relationship, I prayed that I would be blessed with a man who will love me for who I am. There were those who came and in essence wants to have a relationship with me but every time I will ask them to go higher like talking to our leaders in church, they back track and never showed up again. And on the process of feeling rejected, I was also very confident that there will be someone man enough and courageous to face the people above me and yes, be willing to be interrogated. I just know that if there will not be someone at that time yet, that eventually it will come because that’s what I believe God has promised me but it deserves to be written in another story because that in itself is a walk of faith and in total confidence that He who spoke in my spirit is absolutely faithful.

So last January 20, 2015, it was a wonderful anniversary I have with my boyfriend for 3 years. From the North part of Cebu,he sacrificially went to the Central area and met me for our anniversary dinner. God must be with us on that very day because he at that time received a blessing and instead of just the two of us celebrating, our anniversary was witnessed by a person I call friend who also received Jesus as the Lord of his life, that very night. So while me and my boyfriend was thanking Jesus for His never ending grace, it was also a night where the angels in heaven were rejoicing for even one person who makes Jesus as Lord.

While it took me a while to be in a serious relationship, I am super grateful to Jesus for giving me a person totally the opposite of me. I would like to say that he is 100% peaceful phlegmatic and you will put him everywhere and he can just work with anyone else without a problem. Me in return is the let’s do it right now woman who has an opinion over everything, it might be because I am frustrated lawyer but it might happen, who knows. I am a sanguine choleric turned melancholy and sometimes phlegmatic. He told me that I am a balance of all the temperaments. Gotyeah!!!

He is the friendliest and he acknowledged Jesus to be his Lord. I would like to go home rolling instead of riding the jeepney

He is the friendliest and he acknowledged Jesus to be his Lord. I would like to go home rolling instead of riding the jeepney

Because my friends are his friends. He is simply the sweetest.

Because my friends are his friends. He is simply the sweetest.

We are still in love in the year called 3. Yay..

We are still in love in the year called 3. Yay..

He is my number one encourager when life becomes unpleasant towards me and when my moods becomes erratic depending upon the environment and circumstances. I must be a hard person to deal with but three years is a witness that God’s hands must be with and upon the two of us. He stood the test. Amazing.

His love is definitely sacrificing and countless times he sacrificed his time, his resources, and his strength just to be around me and be with me because he knows that I need him to just be around me.

He is my number one supporter and that wherever the Lord leads me, he is the first one to stand behind me be it in preaching which requires the two of us to travel, in bible study, in teaching children, and on other speaking engagements that the Lord entrust me with. And take note, even in my wildest hobby of magazine buying in book sale, although he can’t figure out  yet why I just love Heart Evangelista, he just allowed me to go and buy and his face shines when he just see me in my most childish happiness.

He is my number one listener and in three years of being together, I enjoyed cracking my OA jokes which he never gets tired of laughing, my non-stop talk from non-sense to with sense, my dramas that might be the result of hormones and mid-life crisis hahahaha.

He is my Chef and even in his tired body, he comes to our home, bring something to cook for me and my family, wash the plates, clean the house but take note we don’t have a mansion and it only take 2 minutes to clean our little house because it is a place where one turn has it all. You turn and you see the kitchen, then turn and you will see the bed, and then turn and you will see the dining table. It’s actually like Metro, one store has it all. And by the way, it’s not just me living here. I am with my father, sister, brother and neighbors. Yeah, our neighbors are my father’s classmates in cock fighting that’s why we had pictures of the two of us bravely carrying the roosters. Oh, how scared I was when I touched it and carried it.

He is my prayer partner and he prayed whole heartedly when I was attacked with all kinds of sickness and diseases, when I was having a nervous break down and was always scared, when I was having a hard time on what to do with my life, he prayed like he never prayed before because he knows that when I am at peace and happy, that’s where his happiness is.

He is my ever sweetest loves who gives me flowers out of the blue. He gives me cake with a beautiful design but he is the one eating it hahahaha because I just simply adore the designs and it gives me so much sparkling joy, you really see it glowing in my eyes.

He sacrificed more than I do. He loves me so deeply and I don’t even know how to love him that much in return. He gives unconditionally and I thank Jesus that I waited. I always think of what my contribution in this relationship is but at the end of the day, I can always laugh and tell him with all honesty that without me and my bubbly personality (that if I am in my high spirit hahaha), his life might be boring and that my arrival gives color in his colorless life (assuming hahaha).

While many of the people are so in a rush of seeing us getting married and I thank them for that but I think if I have waited to be 32 to have him, I too can wait for another 32 years if that is the case for us to still be together and get married.

As of this moment, I am just loving in love to be with him in the anniversary called 3 not to to mention that we celebrate this in three. Three is not a crowd. And yeah, when we started, it’s not just the two of us, it originates in 3.

Ecclesiastes 4:12 says, though one may be overpowered. two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.

Thank you Jesus for one great man that you have specially prepared for  me.

Happy Na. Anniversary Pa.